


I Will Not Hurt Dean

by pieandangels



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-10
Updated: 2013-04-10
Packaged: 2017-12-08 02:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/755985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pieandangels/pseuds/pieandangels





	I Will Not Hurt Dean

Castiel adjusted his grip on the knife, holding on to the feeling of cold metal in his hand. At least there was one tangible thing he could focus on in this hazy, confusing world. He hadn't felt real since Purgatory. Something caught his eye, movement behind a pillar across the room. A person. A target. He closed his eyes and willed his vessel to slip through empty space, appearing in front of the pillar. Cocking his head slightly, Castiel walked around the pillar. Pressed flat against the other side was a man in blue jeans and a leather jacket. Castiel felt a kind of tugging beneath his ribcage. Naomi told him it was a training exercise. He had been instructed to kill anything she released into the arena with him, but he had never expected this.

"Cas?" Dean's voice was desperate, strangled. His eyes were full of fear.

 _Do it_. Naomi's voice was clear in Castiel's ear.

"No." Not this. Anything but this. Castiel lowered the knife, reached out a hand to touch Dean's shoulder. "I refuse."

"You will not betray your family again, Castiel," Naomi said. Castiel looked around, trying to find the source of the voice. It was no use; she was inside his head.

"Dean is my family," he said.

"Cas, what's going on?" Dean asked, still huddled against the pillar. Castiel let go of the hunter's shoulder and started walking across the room. She had to be somewhere.

"Dean is a threat," Naomi countered. "After all you've done, all of the angels you killed, you would turn on us again?"

"I can't - " Castiel felt a peculiar sensation, a tightening in his throat and a burning in his eyes. "I don't understand."

"Kill him, Castiel, or we can put you back in the chair."

Castiel recoiled. He couldn't go back to the chair, strapped down while Naomi probed the innermost parts of his being, finding every secret he never admitted to himself. He couldn't let her see those things, tamper with those feelings, ever again.

But he couldn't kill Dean. There was too much history, too many things Castiel had never known how to say. He straightened his spine, determined. He would let her invade him again, if it meant saving the hunter.

"Do it," he said. And then, very suddenly, he was no longer in control of his vessel. He was pushed into the back corners of Jimmy Novak's mind as another force spread itself throughout Jimmy's body. He watched his hand raise the knife again, felt his body turn, and screamed when his vessel dug the knife into Dean's heart, twisting for good measure. The other force subsided as Dean fell forward against Castiel.

"Cas, no," Dean managed as blood bubbled in the corner of his mouth. Castiel fell to the floor, cradling Dean's head in his lap.

"Dean, it wasn't me. I didn't - "

"You did, Castiel," Naomi said, "and now you will again. Leave the body." The foreign force overtook him again, and he stood up. "What have you done to me?"

"I fixed you."

Castiel saw another flicker of movement, another Dean hiding, waiting for the knife. Breathing heavily, Castiel let the force overtake him. Whatever Naomi had put inside his vessel was stronger than him. He retreated into memories of Purgatory, of clarity and comfort and a clear distinction between good and evil. As he drove the knife deep into the next Dean copy, Castiel dwelled on memories of bees and a slick black car. A boy in plaid and a boy in denim.


End file.
